01. There’s no such thing as a chic internet introduction
In our serial-consumer culture, no one talks about just how many internet introductions we endure. Every medium requires a new introduction; never mind that we always follow the same people on every platform. I’ll go a step further—every post, clip, and video begins with some useless, unoriginal blurb. I already know this is a Get Ready with Me TikTok; I don’t need you to tell me again. While I have seen creative ways to make a good first internet impression, I’ve found that there is really no chic way to introduce yourself on and through the internet. Class requires swagger, confidence, and presence. Social media’s limitations do not cultivate the space to convey something chic. A 30 second clip does not allow enough time for someone to earn the title.
With my pretentious SubStack-ish rant aside, I’ll start with the basics.
I’m Madeline, a senior communication major with a concentration in public relations. My favorite courses always have to do with literature, mass media, gender, and creative production, so Gender and Media is right up my alley. Simply, I’m taking this course, because this is my shit.
I work at a cigar lounge (and yes, I do smoke). I have a cat named Posey. I like beer and wine and St. Germain. I love concerts. I have four tattoos and have plans to get more. My two brothers and I are products of China’s One Child Policy. I go to pilates every day. I love day trips and travel in general. I love spontaneity. I thrift most of my clothes and am a firm believer in second-hand superiority. I want to get my masters in mass communication somewhere. I want to live in a walkable city. I don’t want children but I do want a partner. I don’t like my hometown. I love to make new friends. I have been a pescatarian since I was 18.
My media diet mainly consists of consuming, because I am too scared to produce outside of an academic setting despite being a chronic over sharer. I love music, SubStack, podcasts, YouTube, TikTok, and Law and Order SVU; the classiest way to get to know me is through music. I am always scouring Ticket Master for cheap concert tickets and following my favorite artists’ touring schedules. In July 2024, I flew to D.C. for less than 24 hours to go to a Lizzy McAlpine concert.
The way I listen to music is simple—play my obsession constantly until I’m familiar with every syllable and note. While I love the sound of music, I’m more interested in a song’s lyricism. Some of my favorite artists include Lizzy McAlpine, Taylor Swift, Lorde, Hozier, and Djo for this exact reason. What can I say, I find pop music to be interesting. I am nothing more than a teenage girl in my heart of hearts.
Unsurprisingly, what I listen to is based on my mood and the latest happenings in my life, and the boy who broke my heart at the beginning of August inspired my most played Spotify playlist of the month. This playlist reflects my gender identity in romantic relationships, and Margaret Atwood perfectly encompasses the way I am processing the separation.
“Male fantasies, male fantasies, is everything run by male fantasies? Up on a pedestal or down on your knees, it’s all a male fantasy: that you’re strong enough to take what they dish out, or else too weak to do anything about it. Even pretending you aren’t catering to male fantasies is a male fantasy: pretending you’re unseen, pretending you have a life of your own, that you can wash your feet and comb your hair unconscious of the ever-present watcher peering through the keyhole, peering through the keyhole in your own head, if nowhere else. You are a woman with a man inside watching a woman. You are your own voyeur.
”
I love to keep up with the newest pop music releases, and I have fallen in love with the comedic, honest, and catchy music of Audrey Hobert.
“Who’s the Clown?” explores modern dating, a phenomenon that allows both men and women to be morally grey; I applaud Hobert’s boldness to be the bad guy sometimes. The album’s topics are subversive against conservative culture by speaking about casual dating, normalizing not being a traditionally palatable woman, and recognizing the voyeuristic tendencies many women have internalized.
In relation to Margaret Atwood’s famous quote, I have listed some verses and the bridge of Hobert’s lyrics from ‘Thirst Trap’ that evidence Atwood’s claim of self-voyeurism. I hope it inspires you to give it a listen, so you can feel like a 20-something, too.
Stay up, and I pace around, I pace around the room
Wake up, and I'm thinkin' 'bout, I'm thinkin' 'bout you
Can't read, or write, or do what I like to do, ooh
I spend my days 4/20 blazed just thinkin', "What's he gonna do?"
But then I got that thing and you changed me
Now all I ever think's "would you date me?"
And I bet you would, but if you wouldn't, I'll-, I'll-
Catch you in the trenches, comin' to your senses
But now I listen to my playlist and pretend I'm you (pretend I'm you)
Look at what I post and then pretend I'm you (pretend I'm you, uh)
I'm sick and twisted and borin'
But all yours, so let me adore you
I'm not what I used to be
And you don't want me, it's so easy to see
And I'll move on eventually
For now, I'm takin' pictures
— Audrey Hobert
